Publicizing my Decision

In general, I find it easy to tell my friends in the Church about my decision. I still haven't told my parents. I had told a couple of people before I called my sister a day before my post was published here to tell her about it. She thanked me for the courtesy of calling her before the general public knew about it. (Sometimes I can be kind of dense.)

Here is why I don't tell certain people about my decision: I'm worried they will talk me out of it. This decision is a precious tender thing. It symbolizes a lot about myself that I want to cultivate and nourish. It hasn't grown into something strong and independent yet, and so it could easily be uprooted and left to dry out. I only tell certain individuals because I believe they will help support my decision, not reject it. Also, if I tell many people, then I will be held responsible by those people to fulfill my goal, and sometimes I worry about failing. What if I don't follow through? What if I give up on this dream before it has even started, like so many other dreams I've had? I kind of want to follow through just to show myself that I can be committed to something and see it through to the end. If I give up on this dream, how many more opportunities for growth and development will I push aside in my life? 

Now is the time to go after what I want. I've been given the gift of time. I can develop myself into who I want to become and who the Lord wants me to be. How can I be my true and divine self without stepping outside the life of comfort? 

I have the opportunity. I must do it.